Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open...

[Dapper Dan]

I was listening to the John Boy and Billy Show, (a syndicated radio morning show with a decidedly Southern slant), yesterday when they had Chuck Norris as a guest talking about the phenomenon of "Chuck Norris Facts" that has become a part of popular culture. I guess I'm deprived as I didn't know anything about this, even though it's been around a few years. Anyway, there is even a website called chucknorrisfacts.com that lists the top 100 Chuck Norris facts. Some of these are entertaining if you've not seen them...

1. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

2. There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

3. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

4. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

5. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

6. Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

7. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

8. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

9. Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.

10. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.

I understand there are a similar line of "facts" about Linus Torvaldes...

[jayd512]

lol... Try this one! Go to Google, and in the search bar, type

find Chuck Norris

and hit the "Feelin' Lucky" button. Let me know what you think

[Dapper Dan]

ROFL!!! That's too funny. LOL! Oh god my side hurts! lol! You gotta love Google for having an excellent sense of humour!

[Rhinoking513]

Chuck Norris also has the ability to cure cancer with his tears. He also has the ability to make grown men cry with just a glare.

[bigtomrodney]

Chuck Norris also has the ability to cure cancer with his tears.

It's too bad he's never cried

[Rhinoking513]

That's why they haven't cured it yet. Making him cry is like getting free money from the government, there's plenty of it but no one can tap into it.

[cousinlucky]

Please send Chuck Norris to Zoo York City, Please!!!

[Dapper Dan]

-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

-Chuck Norris once shot down an enemy aircraft with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

[Rhinoking513]

If you call any tech support the best answer to give is that "chuck norris will be over to spin kick your modem", if they ask why just respond with "If Norris can't fix it then it deserves to be destroyed.

[Liquidlime]

I once heard Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a football, and scored a goal.


Twenty cities away.