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If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog? Now I would be thinking twice before I call ...
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  1. #241
    Linux Engineer nujinini's Avatar
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    If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?
    Now I would be thinking twice before I call my Dog as "bad"
    nujinini
    Linux User #489667

  2. #242
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    Haha I like the jokes
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  3. #243
    Linux Engineer MASONTX's Avatar
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    A woman went to a psychiatrist and told him, " We have had several break ins in our neighborhood in the last few weeks, and I keep imagining that someone has broken in, and is hiding under the bed. When I get ready to go to bed, I can
    t go into the bed room until my husband goes and checks under the bed. If I wake up at night and need to go to the bathroom, I imagine that as soon as my foot hits the floor, someone will reach out from under the bed and grab my leg. I have to wake up my husband and have him check under the bed before I get up. Why, if I even wake up during the night, I can't go back to sleep for fear that someone has snuck in and is hiding under the bed, I have to wake up my husband to check."
    "Well," the psychiatrist responded,"You have a simple phobia. It is relatively easy to cure, and will take about 20 sessions at $150 a session."
    "That's a lot of money." the woman answered, " I'll have to talk to my husband before I make an appointment."
    A week went by and the psychiatrist hadn't heard from the woman, so he called her and asked, "Have you talked to your husband about making an appointment?"
    "Why yes I have," the woman answered, "and when I told him how much it was going to cost and how long it would take, he said he could cure me in 20 minutes, and he did."
    The psychiatrist was astounded that the woman could be cured so quickly, so he asked, "And how did your husband achieve this miraculous cure, and so quickly?"
    "Oh," the woman replied, "he sawed the legs off the bed."
    nujinini, jayd512 and MikeTbob like this.
    Registered Linux user #526930

  4. #244
    Linux Enthusiast cousinlucky's Avatar
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    A Drunk Rams A Police Car!!

    Drunk Driving is dangerous because people are injured or killed by
    drunk drivers but this story made me laugh out loud!!
    L.I. man charged with DWI was dressed for the occasion:*his T-shirt read
    PCLinuxOS Gnome and PCLinuxOS Mate
    Linux user # 414321
    You Should Not Give In To Evils, But Proceed Ever More Boldly Against Them!! -from book six of Virgil's Aeneid
    Everything Within The Universe Is Related; We Are All Cousins!!

  5. #245
    Super Moderator Roxoff's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cousinlucky View Post
    Drunk Driving is dangerous because people are injured or killed by
    drunk drivers but this story made me laugh out loud!!
    L.I. man charged with DWI was dressed for the occasion:*his T-shirt read
    The language in that news report is like being transported back in time to the late seventies. It's like an episode of the Sweeney '...he was collared...', 'Daly was sloshed...'
    Linux user #126863 - see http://linuxcounter.net/

  6. #246
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    This can be serious stuff.
    His shirt tells the story!

  7. #247
    Linux Guru rokytnji's Avatar
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    Reminded me of some new linux users, (I guess it could apply to Mac and Window users also)

    Harry The Cat
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    Linux Registered User # 475019
    Lead,Follow, or get the heck out of the way. I Have a Masters in Raising Hell
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  8. #248
    Administrator jayd512's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rokytnji View Post
    Reminded me of some new linux users, (I guess it could apply to Mac and Window users also)

    Harry The Cat
    Since I've done help desk work, I can say with authority... those people are real!
    elija likes this.
    Jay

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  9. #249
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    For the first bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    See if they can do it again.

    For the second bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the third bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the fourth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the fifth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the sixth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the seventh bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the eighth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Find a way around it
    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the ninth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Blame it on the hardware
    Find a way around it
    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the tenth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Change the documentation
    Blame it on the hardware
    Find a way around it
    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the eleventh bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Say it's not supported
    Change the documentation
    Blame it on the hardware
    Find a way around it
    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.

    For the twelfth bug of Christmas, my manager said to me

    Tell them it's a feature
    Say it's not supported
    Change the documentation
    Blame it on the hardware
    Find a way around it
    Say they need an upgrade
    Reinstall the software
    Ask for a dump
    Run with the debugger
    Try to reproduce it
    Ask them how they did it and
    See if they can do it again.
    jayd512, elija and Lakshmipathi like this.

  10. #250
    Administrator jayd512's Avatar
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    Awesome!!!
    Jay

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