Jokes/Funny Stuff thread 2012

[nujinini]

A man was out walking a dog, and a woman stopped to admire
the animal.

"What's your dog's name?" she asked.

"Herpes," replied the dog's owner.

"How....odd," said the woman. "Why Herpes?"

"Because he won't heel."

I'm still laughing and it's been two minutes already!!! Good one MikeTbob

[Rubberman]

I'm still laughing and it's been two minutes already!!! Good one MikeTbob

There was a young fellow named Bright
Who traveled much faster than light
He left one day in a relative way
And arrived the previous night!

That way, he could experience this thread again for the first time...

[rokytnji]

Tombstones

In a Ribbesford, England , cemetery:

Anna Wallace

The children of Israel wanted bread,

And the Lord sent them manna.

Clark Wallace wanted a wife,

And the Devil sent him Anna

###############3

In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania , cemetery:

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake,

Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.

###################


In a cemetery in England:

Remember man, as you walk by,

As you are now, so once was I.

As I am now, so shall you be,

Remember this and follow me.

To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:

To follow you I'll not consent,

Until I know which way you went.

[TaZMAniac]

At An Irish Wedding

At an Irish wedding reception the D.J. yelled: “Would all married men please
stand next to the one person who had made your life worth living.”

The bartender was almost crushed to death.

[cousinlucky]

Another Gem; Thanks Roky!!

[rokytnji]

I've been trying to turn over a new leaf.

Problem is.

No trees in the desert.

[elija]

OMG! I've had a few of these already!

[rokytnji]

"What problem and who are you?"

I loved it elija. Thanks.

[Rubberman]

OMG! I've had a few of these already!

Yeah, I resemble that!

[rokytnji]

526155_319045558178379_1778910507_n.jpg

Here is to Nipples.

Without them.
Breasts would be pointless.

reaching.jpg