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My wife left a note on the fridge... "It's not working! I can't take it anymore; I've gone to stay at my friends!" I opened the fridge, the light came ...
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  1. #171
    Linux Guru rokytnji's Avatar
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    My wife left a note on the fridge...

    "It's not working! I can't take it anymore; I've gone to stay at my friends!"

    I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was still cold...

    What the hell is she talking about?!!
    Linux Registered User # 475019
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  2. #172
    Linux Guru Rubberman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rokytnji View Post
    My wife left a note on the fridge...

    "It's not working! I can't take it anymore; I've gone to stay at my friends!"

    I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was still cold...

    What the hell is she talking about?!!
    Maybe her bedside toys ran out of batteries? Of course, my wife's bedside toys mostly consist of her ebook reader and new iPad...
    Sometimes, real fast is almost as good as real time.
    Just remember, Semper Gumbi - always be flexible!

  3. #173
    Linux Guru Lazydog's Avatar
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    My penis is so polite, it stands up so girls have a place to sit.

    Regards
    Robert

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  4. #174
    Administrator MikeTbob's Avatar
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    Trolling.jpg
    Cooper.jpg

    Click 'em for larger images.
    jayd512 likes this.
    I do not respond to private messages asking for Linux help, Please keep it on the forums only.
    All new users please read this.** Forum FAQS. ** Adopt an unanswered post.

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  5. #175
    Administrator jayd512's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeTbob View Post
    Trolling.jpg
    Cooper.jpg

    Click 'em for larger images.
    Dammit... where is the Double-Like button!
    Jay

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    I do not respond to private messages asking for Linux help. Please keep it on the public boards.

  6. #176
    Penguin of trust elija's Avatar
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    And in the "there is no hope" category the nominations are: this driver
    What do we want?
    Time machines!

    When do we want 'em?
    Doesn't really matter does it!?


    The Fifth Continent

  7. #177
    Administrator jayd512's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by elija View Post
    And in the "there is no hope" category the nominations are: this driver
    LOL!
    Proof, once again, that common sense is far from common!
    Jay

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  8. #178
    Linux Guru rokytnji's Avatar
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    The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner. On July 17, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees.

    The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter.
    Henry was curious and invited them into his office.
    They refused and instead asked that he come out to the parking lot to their car.
    They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130 degrees inside, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car off immediately.


    The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office, where he offered them $3 million for the patent.
    The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but they wanted the recognition by having a label, 'The Goldberg Air-Conditioner,' on the dashboard of each car in which it was installed.
    Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Semitic, and there was no way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two million Fords.


    They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on $4 million and that just their first names would be shown.
    And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show
    LO, NORM, HI and MAX -- on the controls.
    jayd512, Lazydog and Sidekick like this.
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  9. #179
    Just Joined! Sidekick's Avatar
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    Joe was unemployed and interviewed for several jobs, but came up empty because of his frustrating stuttering. Still, he plugged on. Today's interview was for a job as a bible salesman.

    "Your resume isn't that impressive, but I ant to give you a chance. Here are 10 bibles. If you can sell these today, we'll consider hiring you," the boss says.

    About an hour later, Joe returns, all bibles sold. "He he he herrr'es y-y-your m-m-money," he says. "I I I s-s-sold them."

    Impressed but skeptical, the boss sends Joe out again with 20 more bibles. By 3 PM Joe had sold them all. "Incredible!" said the bible boss. "You're the best bible salesman we've ever had! You're hired! I must know, what is your secret?"

    "S-s-s-simple," says Joe. "I I I I j-j-just kn-n-nock on the d-d-d-dor and when they answer I introd-d-d-duce m-m-m-myself and ask them, 'I'm s-s-selling these b-b-b-bib-b-bles here. D-d-do you w-w-w-want to b-b-buy one or d-do you w-w-want me t-to r-r-r-read it t-t-to you?' "
    rokytnji and jayd512 like this.

  10. #180
    Linux Guru Lazydog's Avatar
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    Birthdays are good for your health.
    Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays live longer.
    Last edited by Lazydog; 09-05-2012 at 11:43 AM.
    rokytnji and MikeTbob like this.

    Regards
    Robert

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