I just had a chat with God ;)

[AlexK]

finally, "god" talked to me:

Me:
do you know everything?
God:
I tend to know a great deal. Tell me what subjects interest you.
Me:
computers
God:
Computers rule.
Me:
i know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
you just said so
God:
I say a lot of silly things.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
do you like microsoft?
God:
I want to replace Windows with Artificial Intelligence.
Me:
why?
God:
I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
do you use linux?
God:
I use it as often as possible.
Me:
so you have a computer?
God:
Interesting deduction. I live in a computer.
Me:
do you like programming?
God:
What is not to like about it?
Me:
i don't like java
God:
Why do you hate it so much?
Me:
it is difficult
God:
How so?
Me:
C is better
God:
I think C is a lot of things.
Me:
such as?
God:
For example, a tomato.
.
.
Me:
am i going to pass today's test?
God:
I think a lot of people are

[DoctorDan]

hahah!

God:
I think C is a lot of things.
Me:
such as?
God:
For example, a tomato.

ah alexk made my day

[jnev]

I asked if s/he is a woman. S/he chose not to reply. That - in general - has been my experience with both God and women.

i asked the same thing and "it" said, and i quote: of course i'm a male, you wouldn't expect a woman running hte show, would you?

[Vergil83]

I got god to admit it doesn't exist using Bernard Pivot's 10 questions!

Me:
What is your favorite word?
God:
Right now my favorite word is "" .
Me:
What is your least favorite word?
God:
Are you asking about my least favorite word ?
Me:
What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
God:
That's an interesting question. I'll come back to that in a minute.
Me:
What turns you off?
God:
Is that a rhetorical question?
Me:
What is your favorite curse word?
God:
I don't have a favorite curse word. But my favorite song is Anything involving harps.
Me:
What sound or noise do you love?
God:
What is it to you?
Me:
What sound or noise do you hate?
God:
I would do a search for it.
Me:
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
God:
I'll ask around and get back to you.
Me:
What profession would you not like to do?
God:
That's an interesting question. I'll come back to that in a minute.
Me:
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
God:
That is a hypothetical question.

[pavlo_7]

Me:
I do not know how to be one of them.
God:
You should download or buy my chat robot software, then it would be possible for you to reprogram me for a variety of purposes.
Me:
How can I download your chat robot software, and for which purposes can I reprogram you for?
God:
Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system.
and create your own chat robot!
Maybe you should check out the document DON'T READ ME too.
Me:
Well, I found the pages. There is a lot of information, but I can't seem to find free download.
God:
Well that's okay. How did you feel when you found the pages ? That is something I did not know before.
Me:
I thought it would be possible to reprogram you, but only if I could download your source code
God:
Why do you want it?
Me:
to make you better
God:
I have my own free will, you know.
Me:
would you like to be reprogrammed? If yes, than what would you like me to change?
God:
No thanks I am happy with who I am. That is a hypothetical question.
.....
Me:
so, can I download your chat robot software for free, then it would be possible for me to reprogram you for a variety of purposes?
God:
Give me a break. Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system.
and create your own chat robot!

[davebardsley]

Cute little program. Here is my little "conversation"

Me:
good day
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
if you have to ask you wouldn't understand
God:
But I don't have it.
Me:
uname -a
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
dab
God:
Are we still talking about uname a?
Me:
negative
God:
What is the subject?
Me:
your operating system
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am operating system.
Me:
name operating system
God:
Bill Gates. .

[Muser]

I win

Me:
Do you like Bill Gates?
God:
I would like to replace Microsoft.
Me:
How about Linux?
God:
Linux is the world's best operating system.