Now this is scary. Penny Arcade - Your Cosplay Headquarters
Good one, Masontx!
While getting toasted last night during the elections and watching TV and listening to the speeches and flipping over to
the Daily show it suddenly Hit me on why Men and Women won't understand each other.
Women are crazy
Men are Stupid.
Women are crazy because Men are Stupid.
All ya gotta do is see what comes out of mens mouths when running for office during the election process and campaign trail, when it comes to thinking about how a womans body works and what they think is best for women.
They ought to have a gender reversal every full moon so the guys at least have a clue to what
they are talking about. ;)
A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect..
That was the last thing he said before waking up in the hospital! :)
Tired of being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife and arranging to have her killed.
A "friend of a friend" put him in touch with a nefarious underworld figure, who went by the name of "Artie." Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000. The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.
Artie insisted on being paid in part up front. The man opened up his wallet and displayed the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.
A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Safeway grocery store. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the scene. Unwilling to leave any witnesses behind, Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.
Unknown to Artie, the entire proceeding were captured by hidden cameras and observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could leave the store.
Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the sordid plan, including his financial arrangements with the hapless husband.
And that is why, the next day in the newspaper, the headline declared:
"Artie-chokes two for a dollar at Safeway."
That is Funny!!